Current Happenings

OK - so this is not an oldie but unshared goodie but I'm trying to get this blog active again. (Do two buts in a sentence constitute a run-on?)

Today was C.R.A.Z.Y.

I got a call last night that someone wanted to come see my house today at 9:30am. I was up until 9:30 pm cleaning and then up this morning and cleaning by 7:30. I came home for lunch, ready for a nap as this week has been exhausting only to have another realtor call me wanting to show my house at 5pm AND 6pm.

Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled that people are coming to look at the house but managing 3 children of my own plus two extras for most the day AND having a clean house AND helping my kids get their work done while having to be out of the house so that they can show the house?

Yeah. No fun.

On the upside, the kids LOVE takeout but were disappointed that I refused to take them to McDonald's.

On the double upside, have I mentioned that Robert is flying in for the weekend tomorrow?

Can you see my grin?

I think the space shuttle can!

That's my day, focusing on the silver lining.

I'll let you know if any offers come my way. ****fingers crossed & prayers said****

Current Postings

In an attempt to clear out all my drafts, I will be publishing them despite any imperfections. Really my CDO (OCD in alphabetical order, as it should be) can't stand all these drafts just lying about. I hope you enjoy them but honestly, I think you should just be happier knowing my soul is at peace.

Why I Love Language

I love words. I love their liquiescence and how they can flow, trippingly off the tongue.

I love puns and double meanings.

I love a good turn of phrase. Amnesiac exile. Duality of emotion. Verbal hemophilia.

I love finding a good $10 word that can take the place of 15 $1 words - it's just good value.

I love what language tells us about a culture: the French with their Academie Francaise guarding over the purity of their language; the Germans with words that seem to be increasingly spliced together to describe new things; the Americans where slang is becoming a more and more a part of "speaking good English," and adverbs are disappearing almost entirely.

I love the power of language. I have been working on teaching my children to say, "I forgive you," rather than, "That's okay," when someone apologizes, even over small things. It's amazing how freeing it is, for both parties, to hear those three little words.

Easter Lessons

Easter was odd this year. Robert and I, while planning our unwanted separation, failed to consider the fact that we would be apart during a major holiday. Ironically, Rob and my dad were trying to get me to fly up for the weekend to see all the remodeling my husband has done to the shop. I was about ready to book my ticket when a dear agnostic/atheist friend said, "Don't you guys celebrate Easter?"

*LIGHT BULB FLASH*

"Um, yeah, we do. Crap." I replied.

I then began to carry forth on all our family traditions and good times. I bought eggs for dying and the dye kits (that was easy - I even let the kids pick them out instead of just buying the cheapest one). The goodies were a little harder to get (what with trying to lie and propagate the myth of the Easter Bunny) but I finally managed to pawn my kids of on Lizzie and go to the store. (The Saturday morning before Easter Sunday, mind you.)

Then we went to an Easter Egg Hunt at a park. We came home (after 3 hours of waiting, hunting, bounce housing and winning raffles) and I was exhausted. I collapsed and took a nap. We had take out and then dyed eggs. It was 9pm by the time the kids were in bed. Then I had to make the basket (I only did one this year) and wrote up clues for a treasure hunt. It was well after midnight by the time I picked up the house and went to bed.

The kids were up bright and early! Egads. I surfaced at about 7am and we did the hunt. After we found the basket, I realized that not once this whole weekend (Good Friday was the Cub Scout Pinewood Derby) had we discussed Jesus. Not once. So I made a mention but then it was time to get ready for church.

I somehow made it through sacrament, went out to the comfy chairs in the lobby and slept through Sunday School and then slept in Relief Society. When we got home, it was off to Grandpa's house for the family egg hunt and lunner.

By the time we got home, 6pm, I was so exhausted I told the kids, "You know your bedtimes, get ready for bed, watch a movie and go to bed at the right time," and then I went to sleep. I slept straight through until 7am.

SO....

the point of this very long tale?

Being a single parent SUCKS! I have no idea how people do this year after year, holiday after holiday. I will say, in hindsight, I have learned that prioritizing is a must. I was so dismayed to find that my children and I had talked very little about the atonement, cruxifiction and resurrection. I know they got some of that in church but I view church lessons as supplemental not primary. (HA! Pun not intended.) I was also dismayed that I was so exhausted that Easter Sunday became more something I had to get through instead of something I could enjoy.

God willing I will never have to go this alone again. But, if I do, I think I would cut out more of the secular and let things fall by the wayside and opt for more spiritual lessons and more sleep for Mom.

My kids were happy; they got loads of candy and good stuff and at this point in their lives, that seems to be the best part of Easter. And I think that's why my lack of presenting the other side to this holiday bothers me; as a parent, I don't think I will ever stop worrying about my children's spiritual development and wanting to do all I can to help it.

Self-Delusional

Did you notice I didn't post yesterday? I didn't on purpose; I was afraid my inner devil might come out and I might do something crazy, which would then make me feel guilty and the vicious cycle would just continue.

So, I abstained. It took some doing (duct taping my hands to my butt) but I did it!

The kids and I recently had the joy (no sarcasm here) of tending a friend's farm animals while she was out of town. We loved it! There were three lambs, a llama, 3 rams, a bunch of bottomless pit, I'm always so damn hungry goats and sheep and a few large dogs disguised as cows.

And of course, we HAD to take pictures.

I don't know about you, but I have a vision of myself in my head. Said vision, does not look like this:

or this:

But when you see yourself in all your 2-D glory, it hits you, BAM!!! Maybe that darn Wii Fit was right and I really am obese with a horribly high BMI.

And maybe, just maybe, I don't really look like this:

Ok. So I'm not quite THAT delusional.

But still.



And then, to add insult to serious injury, I get this email:

Hi Maraiya, cute picture! It's sure fun being back in Alaska... do you miss being here? I thought I heard a rumor that maybe your family is moving to Alaska? Is that right? I'm convinced that Alaska is our home ... and I love it!

My focus for 2009 is regaining my health! I kind of lost track of myself for a number of years ... but I've found myself again! Yeah! Check out my webiste: XXX.isagenix.com. I'd love to have you join my team! :)

Now, I realize that my friend (who hasn't said boo to me since we hooked up on facebook) is just looking for more people on her downline. I know that! But internally? This is my dialogue:

Holy Hannah! I'm fat! I'm so fat that people I don't know very well are calling me and saying,"Hey Maraiya! You look like you could lose some weight and you look fat enough that you look desperate to lose weight. So desperate that you will be willing to buy my uber expensive product and sell it to all your friends, because you know, after using my uber expensive product, you will be trim and svelte!"

Crikey.

What did I do to get over this terribly travesty?

Well.....

I laid down for a bit.

Ate some chocolate.

And taped this to the mirror:

so I could slip back into my nice safe delusion

AND - I vowed never to let my children use my camera again!