The Mouse Has Landed

I would throw an exclamation point after the title but I feel like I'm over using those bits of punctuation and they're just too powerful to be callously tossed about.

So, we made it. I've been up since 4am. Okay, 4:10am (I took the luxury and hit snooze once). The first leg to Seattle was quite smooth and easy and no problems. The kids watched a movie in the airport and then we walked to the food court (Holy gift of God, Batman, we found a table!) and had Wendy's burgers at 9:30am. Mmm...nothing like needing lunch before 10am! We made a video, I'll be sure to post it later, that required many takes as to avoid names and faces of my children (paranoid hubby). We played Mancala, Go Fish and sipped a Frosty (the real reason we ate at Wendy's).

We boarded the plane and lo and behold, sitting in first-class was Calista Flockhart and her son Liam. Really. I stared good and hard to make sure. That' s me - uber classy!

We walked to our so not first-class seats (row 25) and had an uneventful flight. No real food (but we were full of a Wendy's gut bomb) and while they offered Jones sodas, it was only the standard flavors, no Green Apple. So. Sad.

The real excitement came via, what else, bodily functions. Quinn used the airplane restroom, oh, whoops, lavatory, 3 times - it was a 2 hour flight. 2 hours. And when the plane was descending, he said that he had to go again. Urgently. I told him to hold it. And then poor Lulu had to go. She'd been sleeping two hours but woke up as we were in descent and the lavatories were closed off. By the time the plane had come to a stop, she was crying because she had to go. What could I do? I picked her up hoping she would calm down and hold it just 5 more minutes (really, eternity) and she didn't. Nope. Started peeing on me; I dropped her placed her gently on ground and let her pee on the aisle carpet. Seriously. What else was I supposed to do?!?! Then they announce that the airplane is too far forward and could everyone please be seated so they could back up a skoshe. I sat and placed Lulu on my lap. Yea. I had pee on my shirt and now one nice big wet spot on each of my thighs. People, this is mother love.

We deboarded the plane and I told the flight attendants that there had been an accident on the right side of the aisle between rows 24 and 25.

"On the seat or on the floor?" they queried.

"On the floor." I replied.

"What do you mean by accident? Did they spill..."

"Pee. She peed." I said pointing at Lulu.

And with that, we left. Really, people, what was I supposed to do?

So, as we are waiting for our baggage (and I am surreptitiously glancing at Calista and looking for Harrison - who was no where to be found), I hear them announcing that the next flight (our plane was turning around and going back to Seattle) was being delayed by an "unscheduled maintenance." At first I panicked a bit and thought I would be blogging about how we narrowly avoided disaster. But later, driving in the car with my dad, it dawned on me - they were, most likely, cleaning up my daughter's urine!

Note to the travel weary: Children peeing on aisle carpeting could delay the outbound flight by 30 minutes.

Note to all those who traveled on the outgoing flight: I am so, so, SO sorry.

Note to the older couple who sat next to me and were completely nonplussed by my child urinating on the exit of our row: Thank you for your patience, humor and compassion.

Oh, and thank you all - BiV, Evil Mia (mwahahahahah), Stefanie, Lizzie, Shelby and Laura (and David Santos - spoken in bass voice) - for leaving me sweet messages. It was so nice to arrive here after all the excitement and read such love. Thank you.

And BiV, I'm SOOOOOO happy that I'm finally feeding on your blog.